Who wants to be a billionaire - Part 1  

Posted by lafemmereva in

If you are an attention whore public transport is your best pimp. For the aesthetic public bus stop junta will instantly rate all feminine forms and display the score card in their eyes in (Richie Rich style). I almost always get 10/10.
Not that I go topless like some Presidents but my mornings are now the most awaited phase of the day which is a very disturbing trend.

All this because a certain "legality" came in the way of me driving my car from friday last until the 4th day of this week. After which the public Junta can revert to rating my auto's rear as I speed past them.

So fab mornings despite No Starbucks routines.

Bus rides have been a unfailing source of entertainment. Take for instance this office going couple. For those of you that are following and are followed on Twitter a pet peeve is when tweeples tweet with each other and it clogs your page restricting other's updates.

Same principle at work here too. This couple always occupy the same corner of the bus and giggle and coochie coo for eternity much to the chagrin of fellow Ipod abiding bus-izens. It always tickles my fancy to know what they are whispering into each other's ears.

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This evening I was bit under the weather so I took the cab back home. Not being much of a cabbie conversationalist I almost always doze off in a cab. This ride was no different. My mind wandered to relive the events of last evening.

My bedroom window overlooks the balcony of 2 houses within a yard of mine - House#1 and House#2. House #1 boasts of Dil Chata Hai types residents - a handsome threesome of which the "Saif Ali" type's singular activity is to bathe in the bathroom all evening and hang out a very deplorable line of personal innerwear in the clothesline in balcony.
The "Aamir Khan" types caught my fancy. Ever since they moved in, 2 weeks ago, I have been more regular at my study table by the window in full "costume" making hearts with my hand in air and all. He always seemed to smile, reciprocate and blow air kisses and this brought me to almost call my dad and ask him to book the wedding hall and all for a "Winter Wedding". That is until I noticed the blue tooth wireless headset which was "Comfortably Numb" on his ear. Alas, he was doing what every man who comes to the west to make money does in the evenings - Listen to his honey back in the other hemisphere.

Bah!! who cares. He is not my types anyways.

The 3rd "
Akshay Khanna" "Homewrecking types" is always peeping into the House#2 where a newly married Indian couple have moved in. And how life is unfair, for the wife of House#2 thinks that my "full costume" display meant for the "Aamir Khan" is actually meant for her husband. I always have a feeling I see her mouth "Homewrecker" at me when she comes out to stand in the balcony with a broom in hand. When the "real homewrecking peeping tom" (Akshay) is standing a balcony above her voyeuring at her while she inducts me into her personal "Hall of homewrecking shame".

Dale Carnegie is not the only one who knows "How to win friends and influence people" So does
Lafemmereva. I will woman up and tie a Rakhi on her hubby's hand on Raksha Bandhan and that will make us both good neighbors over good fences.

Checkmate
Akshay!

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Part 2 is here

This entry was posted on Monday, May 11, 2009 at Monday, May 11, 2009 and is filed under . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .

11 comments

since almost all ur posts are so hilarious, im just going to put down here lines that made me laugh the most:

'making hearts with my hand in air and all'- laughed my head off on this one..

May 11, 2009

Another suda suda post from revaness
hehehehee.. I also love public transport for precisely teh same reasons.. loads of interestng patterns hovering around people's heads and their halos

At one point, I started making "strange" faces at every unsuspecting child in my vicinity at all traffic signals. Then I decided to be respectable and began drivin my own car.:D

No. The parents of the child did NOT stone me.

May 11, 2009

lol lol lol!! Chuck Dale Carnegie's books, ll ask Random House to contact you! :) and 10/10, costumes eh, he he.. naughty! :)

and I happen to know what the coochie coo in the back of the bus is all about! wanna know? :)

May 12, 2009

@aparna Danke :)

May 12, 2009

@saya Revaness is henceforth your copyrighted invention.

They did NOT stone you? Y? Were they stoned:P

May 12, 2009

@varun Yes---you know my email.They can email me or chat and I will respond - If I am not on calls :P

Yes we want to know...all of us. What happens in there?

May 12, 2009

They had to attend to the cryin baby who was subjected to my experiments on contorting facial muscles.

May 12, 2009

@saya - You do know one day you will have a baby and then karma will come biting you know where :P

May 12, 2009

hahahhha....rofl...people sitting near me at work probably think i'm a crazy person...i laugh (out loud) like crazy reading your posts and the guy next to my desk just got up to ask if i was ok ;-)...anyway

May 12, 2009

@ersa.. who I say calls u crazy!!! Tell them u settle for nothing less than "gorgeous"!!

May 20, 2009

@ersa - and for revenge send them the post link !! revenge is a dish best served cold!

May 20, 2009

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