Part 1 of this series is here.
Okay, next time I should fly first class and never book an aisle seat. Like every 5 minutes I had to lift my legs up and hold it that way to make way for the kid in the window seat and the girl in the middle seat. Like I was in labour and the baby was going to come out any moment or something!! Several such exercises and 2 plates of cutlets later I was bored. Boredom, after all, knows no season right? Soon ...
Girl in Middle Seat (GIMS) : Hi, sorry to bother you everytime I need to head out.
Me: Oh, Not a problem! (I didn't want to risk keeping you away from
the restroom! I can't even open the windows!!)
GIMS : I hate this food, Its really bad (Parallely wiping out the food
plate!) So bad, So bad (Requests another plate and finishes that
too!!). I just hate flying.
If at that moment Angelina Jolie or Madonna had seen her they would have been rest assured she was an overgrown starving kid from malawi or some such nation suffering from oedema(water retention which causes swollen limbs) and adopted her. Me thinks next time, she should take the submarine. The sea lions will have a good meal atleast!!!
I go back to the Sophie Kinsella that I was reading and suddenly feel a tap on my hand. It's the kid in the window seat who looks like Harry Potter trapped in Calvin's Body. Let's call him Calvin Kumar.
Calvin: I am scared.
Me : (So am I! I mean what if GIMS throws up all the food she has had, maybe we
would all drown in mid air and it would rain cutlets on earth !!!Pretending not to be
scared and not looking from the book in hand) Why?
Calvin: There is a plane next to ours and its making a loud noise. I think its going to hit us.
Me : (WTF, Yes, I can hear it too. No! I am scared, Captain, Make a lane change!!! Don't
speed) I'm sure its just a mechanical glitch. Dont worry!
After some moments of peace and quietude. A loud roar like a tuning fork of infinite amplitude that was held captive by Stephen hawking in a physics lab was just let loose and is roaring and running out of the physics lab singing "Jai Ho" , "Jai Ho".
I tried to reach for my first Lifeline. As I was about to call the flight attendant I accidentally held the hand of GIMS. And the sound stopped. I let go of her hand and then the roar started.
GIMS was the roaring tuning fork. GIMS's snore was the "other" plane that Calvin heard.
Sheepishly Calvin and I go off to sleep. And then I had them, nightmares. Visions of me landing at the Chennai Airport.
Nightmare sequence -
AK: " And for the question that will win you 50,000 rupees What did Reva and Raju (Satyam) have in
common? "
Jamaal: "Nothing".
AK : "Are you sure?"
I was suddenly jolted by another loud roar. No, we were really taxying in London. It was a nightmare after all. Phew!! I hadn't even reached London, let alone Chennai. I still had hope. Desperate times will call for desperate measures. Half the ordeal was over. The last leg of the journey remained. With all these thoughts filling my head I stepped on the London Ground. In all the events that had filled the day through all the time zones there was another small event that went unnoticed.
I had also completed a quarter of a century on Planet earth. I was 25. It was October 18th, 2008. Happy birthday me! :)
The remaning journey to be continued in upcoming posts.....Stay tuned! I will be back after a commercial break.
Ad: Pigeons dance to Masakalli song and say in chorus " We make distances shorter. Have message , will deliver."
